Commemorating the Bay Bridge

The tradition of commemorative chicken breeds is an honored one; from the
Columbian Plymouth Rock variety created in honor of the Columbian Exposition, to
the Coronation Sussex in honor of King George, the breeders of poultry have
honored memorable events with new poultry varieties. Both of these were far less
expensive events than the Bay Area Bridge with its attendant party.

Truly the new Bay Bridge deserves its own commemorative breed.

Last night the local TV news explained that the new Bay Bridge was ten years
late and around 5 billion over budget, and might not open until 2014 due to
suspect construction and design. The next story covered how SF spent a great
deal of money subsidizing the America's Cup race in the hopes of income from
visitors and racing fans, and detailed how seats in the viewing area were now
free of charge because no one was particularly interested in watching - even the
food stands don't bother to open up anymore. It seems everyone interested in
watching is out on the water with a pair of binoculars.

So, I got to thinking about it. In addition to a suspect bridge that many
commuters might choose to avoid, and a BART strike, we have the strong SF Bay
culture of sailing. Is it possible that many commuters will choose to sail to
work in order to avoid possibly dropping into the Bay from the Bridge of
Damocles or to avoid the endless delays and strikes of BART?

What about our strong green culture, with the desire to save water by
xeriscaping and to not needless garbage, such as discarded cans of air or
batteries from boat horns? And what about the interest in fancy poultry that
are highly decorative and lay colored eggs? What about producing birds that can
successfully forage in the Bay Area and reduce the green house gases involved in
the production and shipping of chicken feed?

Obviously, we have a niche for a designer chicken for those who will now be
sailing to work in SF as opposed to riding the not running BART or crossing the
Bridge of Damocles.

A uniquely Bay Area bird would lay a highly visible colored egg, be a beautiful
decorative ornamental living boat horn, would be capable of living happily in a
xeriscape without any additional water, and would conscientiously forage in the
mud flats while the boat is in its slip.

Some of the answer is found in Java, with the green jungle fowl. Adapted to live
with little fresh water in mangrove swamps, in the dry season it lives on
collected dew, and the liquids found in fruits and insects. In addition to
insects, the birds feed on aquatic animals washed up on the shores and in
littoral pools, which Red Jungle Fowl can't do. At low tide, these wonderful
birds forage for starfish, small crabs, copepods and detritus. At high tide they
fly to mangrove islets to roost.

The Indonesian tradition has done much of the work for us, as the Javanese have
bred living boat horns in the form of a half-domestic chicken, half-green jungle
fowl known as the Ayam Bekisar, that is the perfect starting point for a new
Bay Bridge commemorative chicken. Unfortunately, males from this cross are prone
to fertility issues when crossed with domestic fowl, and it takes generations of
backcrosses to produce fertile females. Fortunately that part of the work has
already been done in the form of various landraces descended from Ayam Bekisar
found on Ponape, the Marquesas and Rapa Nui. So, the first step would be to
simply select those cocks and hens whose male descendants have farthest
carrying, loudest calls.

To set the egg color would involve crossing these birds with some of the best
true Americauna blue egg layers. This is only sensible, given that the blue egg
laying Aracauna itself apparently inherited its ability to lay colored eggs from
remote green jungle fowl ancestors.


The descendants of this cross, with the best egg color and voices would have
then have their genes concentrated with backcrosses to set these desirable
traits.

The former mayor of Oakland and current governor of California, Jerry Brown
deserves commemoration in the development of this bridge. His pioneering efforts
to involve an extremely diverse group of bridge stakeholders in planning the
bridge are especially noteworthy, given that they included architects,
bicyclists, hikers, mass transit officials and many other groups, every
stakeholder imaginable with the exception of the majority of bridge users who
drive vehicles across it. This elaborate effort to replace the original, easily
built, and far less expensive proposed bridge design with one that met his high
aesthetic standards makes it clear that any bird honoring the new Bay Bridge
should also pay tribute to his contribution.

Therefore, the best of the line bred birds would be crossed to Brown Leghorns
in order to give this new breed a decorative color, a loud carrying crow, and
beautiful blue eggs. An important part of the selection process would involve
choosing birds that truly enjoy the sound of their own voice.

But the end results would be worth it.

Ladies and gentleman, let us get to work on developing a marvelous new
commemorative breed, the Brown Foghorn Leghorn.